Review - What Happens in Vegas by Jenna Byrnes
What Happens in Vegas by Jenna Byrnes is an m/m contemporary short story at 29 pages told in one third-person viewpoint and set in an under-described Las Vegas, Nevada. It features one detailed sex scene at a 4 to 5 on the ever-popular 1 to 5 sex scene scale.
Steve is a lawyer from Portland, Oregon who is maybe in his late thirties. He's in Las Vegas on business with two co-workers, Jake and Dylan. Jake is roughly Steve's age and Dylan is about ten years younger. The story opens in a (female) stripper bar where Jake eagerly waves a five dollar bill that he wants to stuff into a dancer's g-string while Steve, who is gay, looks on with bored tolerance. Steve is used to his male coworkers acting like drunken frat boys whenever a trip takes them to Sin City.
At his first opportunity, Steve extricates himself with an excuse about wanting to go back to their hotel and rest. Instead, he heads to a gay bar so he can have a drink and unwind in a "gay-friendly" atmosphere. He even loosens up enough to try playing the slot machines. To his surprise, Dylan follows him into the bar and gives him advice on how to play.
Steve can't help feeling uncomfortable because he tries to be discreet about his sexual orientation, and definitely doesn't want to be gossiped about back at their firm. But Dylan comes on to him in a really obvious way – hands all over him – and soon Steve is aroused and tempted to go for the sexual encounter that he's long been denying himself (due to work, I'm assuming). After all, as the saying goes, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
The two men return to Dylan's hotel room where they have a hot and detailed sex scene and find out that they're extremely sexually compatible. They doze and have sex off-and-on through the night, and Steve wonders if this encounter could turn into a long-term relationship once they're back in Portland.
Towards morning, they get disturbed by a knock on the door. Steve checks to see Jake in the hall, looking bleary-eyed and drunk, and asking to come in. Steve opens the door and two goons rush in with Jake and attack Steve, knocking him unconscious. Obviously they took poor Jake hostage and used him to get into the room.
Steve wakes to find himself and Jake in a different hotel suite. They're sitting in chairs and tied down. Meanwhile, he can hear the goons beating up Dylan in the other room. Dylan did admit earlier in the evening that he used to live in Vegas, and now it looks as if his mysterious past is catching up with him. Steve now has to figure out how to get himself, Jake, and Dylan out of danger.
Here at Obsidianbookshelf.com, I think What Happens in Vegas has an interesting premise and it does a decent job of developing it within the constraints of its short-story length. It's competently written and plotted, and offers the reader hot erotica plus an unexpected 90-degree turn into a dangerous situation. I had two problems, but I'll emphasize that they're small ones that probably aren't going to bother a lot of readers.
My first regret is that the story didn't cut a little deeper with some vivid touches that would have brought Vegas alive. Dylan helps with his slot-machine strategy and when he explains why there are no clocks in the casinos. But he's telling us things whereas it's always better to see it through a vivid description. We readers don't get much of the sights and sounds of Vegas – the neon, the fantasy architecture of the casinos, the blazing desert heat, and the desperation of the gamblers. It's true that you can't fit too much of this into a short story, but a line or two is always possible.
My second regret is that Steve's reaction doesn't seem to fit the dangerous situation. He doesn't seem nearly frightened enough nor all that concerned for Dylan, and this kept the threat a little unreal for me. However, Jake is terrified, which goes a long way towards saving the story for me. I think that 99% of us would feel exactly the same way as Jake in a similar situation. His reaction definitely helps to counterbalance Steve's, and overall I recommend What Happens in Vegas. COPYRIGHT: All content copyright © Obsidian Bookshelf, except where noted. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without written permission from Val Kovalin is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Val Kovalin and Obsidianbookshelf.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. Click for more information.
Links:
Posts
